Captivated by Purpose {Life updates, Photos & Reflections}
Hello Friends! Well, it has officially been over a year since I’ve posted any kind of update. In reflection of why this is, I feel as though it may be because Kenya just feels like home now. This is my life, why would I post a blog to update people on my day-to-day? Normal people in North America wouldn’t do so, so why would I? As I have been receiving messages from friends back home, I’ve come to the realization that people want to hear how life is going over here. Especially with this whole pandemic, there is a particular concern for those living overseas. ALSO, I just went on safari and I love posting photos of all the animals, so maybe this is part of the push to finally share a bit ;)
We are also going into a big year of unknowns (as I know many of you are), so along with a little update, I wanted to share some specific prayer requests. This is for those who are prayerfully lifting me up during this time. Thank you to all of those who choose to support me on this journey, I am humbled and so joy-filled by all the support.
Overview of the Past Year
School
This past year I moved to teach grade 4. Wow, I can’t believe how much I loved teaching grade 4! Grade 5 was such fun, however, with grade 4 they are just a bit smaller, they love hugs a little more, they still laugh at my corny jokes and they have a little less sass. I also had the opportunity to teach 15 kids this year (instead of 26 in grade 5). We split grade 4 which provided the unique chance to teach fewer kids and have someone I taught along with. Sam was my co-teacher who taught the other class of grade 4’s right next door to me. We split the planning, I planned all of Bible and ELA, while she planned all of science, socials, and math. I can’t even explain how wonderful it was to just focus on 2 subjects and plan them well. Additionally, in grade 4, Bible is all about learning theology. We covered everything from the Omniscience/ Omnipotence/ Omnipresence of God, what is sin, who is Jesus Christ, what is substitutionary atonement, spiritual beings, and how to grow deep in a relationship with God through prayer, bible reading, community, and serving. The challenge of putting all of this into 8-year-old language became the greatest joy of each week. Below you can find a few photos of the school & my kidlets.
Covid-19 {Choosing to Stay in Kenya}
In March, a week before spring break, we received the news that schools were closing due to COVID-19. The news came on a Sunday, we went to school Monday to copy as many things as we could for the following weeks, planned online school on Tuesday and launched online school Wednesday. On Friday of that week, we were called into an emergency meeting where all of our ex-pat staff were told: “either choose to stay for an indefinite amount of time or go home now.” That news came on a Friday, all of the airways closed the following Wednesday. More than half of the staff left to go to America. It was a really hard decision to stay, staying meant that I would possibly miss my brother’s wedding, staying meant I would maybe not get to visit home this summer, staying meant a lot of unknowns. For a while, it kind of felt like everyone was jumping ship and I kept looking around to figure out of I was clinging to something that was sinking. Every evacuation flight that was offered {though over 4000$ one way}, felt like an urging to “leave while you can.” Yet through it all, there remained a deep sense of needing to stay. As though the waves were crashing, I could feel the tug and pull of the storm, but my God was sheltering me, speaking peace into my heart. I am still unsure why exactly He called me to stay, this summer hasn’t been all easy. Yet through it all, I look back and know for certain He wanted me here.
A Kenyan Summer/Winter Break
It’s winter here in Kenya, which means I am currently bundled up in socks, a cozy blanket, and a hot coffee. Being 5000ft above sea level makes Nairobi get down to 9-10 degrees. Brr! Okay, all y’all in Canada can laugh, but to us it is cold. My favorite part about winter here is that you can go out and all around there are Kenyans decked out in touques, down jackets, and up to 5 layers. I tell you, it’s cold!
Our school break is in June& July. So, it has been my first Kenyan summer/winter holiday. At first, I would complain to my roommate about not wanting to stop working. I’m here near my classroom, why would I want to completely take a break? I’m realizing as years go by, the summer holiday never gets easier. As a teacher, we are working at such high capacity throughout the year, just stopping is really hard. After a week of break which consisted of a lot of cutting, laminating, printing, and decorating, Maerissa pulled me out and told me to stop. We bought ukulele’s and began to learn how to strum a few tunes. I discovered how sweet it is to have uninterrupted, non scheduled time with Jesus, and I have even taken a few naps! The break ended up being full of working out, connecting with different friends, a few days of binge-watching Netflix, and a lot of soul-filling time to reflect, read, and pray.
Your Brother got MARRIED?
Yes, my brother got married to his wonderful, beautiful wife Kirsten on July 10th. I didn’t end up going and that was really really hard. However, God was really faithful and good in still giving me meaningful moments with them throughout the day. They called me in the morning and I had the chance to pray over them before the day began. Bray called me as he tried on His tux and Kirsten called me when she got into her dress. Then, Braden put the phone in his front pocket on speakerphone so I could hear the whole ceremony. Since they were on the beach, it was actually very windy. Most people couldn’t hear the vows, but I go a front-row seat to it all. It wasn’t exactly how I pictured it, but the way it played out provided some beautiful intentional moments that otherwise wouldn’t have happened.
Here are some photos of the day & their wedding video
Wedding Video: https://www.dorseweddings.com/blog/braden-kirsten
Photos courtesy of the lovely Brianna Page
Some Jesus Reflections
Comparison, anxiety, and purpose are all things I’ve been wrestling with the past month. A quote I came across a few weeks ago says “we won’t be distracted by comparison if we are captivated by purpose.” As I read this, I could feel the Holy Spirit stirring in me something new. What is the purpose I am captivated by? If I am, to be honest, I am often captivated by the purpose of finding the things that bring me the most comfort, the greatest status boost, and bring me joy. Ugh, cue heart convictions. Really what I am loving discovering about Jesus is how he is never surprised by our messiness. He isn’t like “Hey Breanna, wow that’s a lot of pride and apathy you’ve got going on there.” No! He just wants us to come to him, praying “Lord go at the deep pieces in me that I have no clue how to fix.” As I’ve been praying this, I can feel the Father nudging me into the question of “What does it look like to be captivated by Jesus’ purpose for me?” Really my purpose is to build the HIS kingdom. So how do I do that? What actions can I walk out into that allow for me to become more captivated by His purposes?
A good friend of mine suggested last year that I could begin praying for the waiter at restaurants as they serve me my meal. Or even just ask the person if they have anything I could pray for as I am about to say grace. That was a nice thought, in theory, however when I tried it, my hands got real sweaty, my heart started beating real fast and what I realized was I was too scared to. Yet, in the past month, as I have begun this journey in seeking to be captivated by purpose, I could feel God nudge this idea back into my mind. The new thing was, I really WANTED to do it. I wanted to have that kind of boldness. So, when we went on Safari this past week, we were served by the same waiter every night. I prayed the first night we were there “Lord, by the end of this trip, let me ask this waiter how I can pray for Him.” The last night we were there, I knew it might be my last chance. He came to bring us our food and I realized I wasn’t even nervous. The boldness I had prayed for earlier that week, it was in me! I asked Jackson “We are about to say grace and I was wondering if there is anything I can pray for you for.” He didn’t understand, so I had to say it a second time. Slowly the sides of his mouth began to form this glowing smile. He put down his food for the other table, looked at me and said “Oh yes! I would love that.” To which then I realized that He wanted me to pray over him… right now! So I did, and for the rest of the evening, Jackson wore that smile. He even shared that He was a believer as well.
I recognize that not every time will be like this, but God used this to help my heart. It grew my boldness and even excitement as I saw what God did through me. It wasn’t big, it wasn’t flashy, but I could see the way it blessed Jackson. It helped me also, to be a bit more captivated by my purpose.
Safari Adventures
With all of the limitations because of this pandemic, we have been unable to leave Nairobi at all. The President just announced two weeks ago that borders were able to be opened between counties. So, Mae and I planned a trip to visit the Mara. At the moment, the great migration is happening which means normally prices would be through the roof to visit the Mara during this time of year. However, with international borders still be closed, we were very blessed to receive a great deal. We spent 3 days, glamping right inside the park. Right outside our tent was a river where over 30 hippos lived. Our driver was beyond friendly, the weather was divine, the food was amazing, and being out in nature was exactly what I needed. It felt as though God was giving me the most peaceful, loving hug for 3 days straight. Here are a few photos from our trip.
Prayer Requests & Praises
Our school teachers & team. We will be working to teach virtually until at least January 2021. Please pray for strength, joy, energy and hearts that are still focused on ministry even through online learning.
Our ex-pat staff + new teachers coming back from North America. The Kenyan international borders will be opening as of August 1st. Please pray that everyone has an opportunity to come back into the country and for smooth transition back.
For myself, please pray for a renewed sense of joy and striving to cultivate peace in trusting my Father to provide and work.
I will be leading a bible study with the elementary teachers at our school. Please pray for authenticity, softened hearts to the Spirit of God and deeper unity.
Our students. For hearts that are being softened to hear the gospel, and for minds that are open to learning online for a semester.
PRAISE: We made it through the summer, learned the ukulele and even enjoyed some time away at the Mara.
PRAISE: We have the opportunity to do online school and still teach our kids!
